social networking 101

I've been feeling a little under the weather the past couple of days, so that means I've been spending more time on facebook than one probably should.  It amazes me how etiquette online and etiquette in the real world are, for some reason, very different.  So, I came up with a list of pet peeves I have with common occurrences on our beloved networking sites.  Again, I've got some time on my hands...

• If you are "feeling under the weather" we don't need to know all the details, down to the number of tissues you've consumed and your bathroom schedule.  Would you tell me that information in person?  Probably not.  Stick to vague posts, such as "having the flu stinks!" 
• If you're having marital issues, we don't need to know that either!  Please refrain from spouse bashing.  There is a difference between light teasing and over share.
• Light teasing - my wife just tried to pet a skunk, thinking it was a cat.  looks like she's sleeping outside tonight!  pee yew!
• over share - my husband is an idiot, how does he get dressed in the morning!?
• If someone posts something you feel is controversial, refrain from posting hateful, snotty remarks, especially if you don't know the person well.  You never know if you're reading the comment in a different tone than they intended. 
• Just avoid hateful snotty posts/remarks/status updates period
• If you're over the age of 12 and your relationship is "it's complicated"  you're not in a relationship
• Just because you're self absorbed and take 23954 pictures of yourself daily, doesn't mean that you need to post them all.  You think you're pretty, we get it.  Pardon me as I remove you from my wall 
• oh yeah, and then don't post how ugly you are, clearly you don't think so
• speaking of pictures, if you don't know how to operate a basic camera, please don't post pictures.  If it's really blurry, super under/over exposed, or the subject is blocked by your finger, we can't tell what it is.  Also, if you've got multiples of that type of shot, you don't need to post them all, we still don't know what you're trying to show us. 
•  If you went to the zoo and saw a tiger, post 2 or 3 pictures where you can clearly tell that you saw a tiger, not 78 pictures of a blurry orange smudge. 
• If you went somewhere at night and forgot the flash, don't post your solid black pictures.  They're not interesting, I don't care if the real Elvis was standing with Marilyn Monroe or not, I still don't believe you.